Monday, March 17, 2008

You're Entitled To Your Feelings

The comments I have read so far lead me to really believe that what I did was the right thing. I don't really feel the need to defend my words, or to delete yours. Say what you want, it honestly and truly doesn't upset me, scare me, or hurt me.

There is nothing wrong with continually and quietly keeping a very angry and out-of-control person in your prayers. There is nothing wrong with saying that I've watched it all unfold, and I'm concerned. None of you know me in real life, and thus, have no idea what possible reason I could have for writing. That's okay too.

What I said stands for itself. You are free to decide for yourself what you feel about it - just as I came to my own conclusions about your old blog, Kyle. I haven't called you any names, nor will I, regardless of the words you hurl at me. It is too bad that you will not extend me the same courtesy for simply caring about you and holding you in my prayers. I suspected you would not be that courteous, but I hoped for better. I still hope for better. I accept your views. I even accept your words.

For the rest of you, I've made sure to keep my language simple, since my apparently-unintelligible use of the word "vitriol" made a few of you feel... "vitriolic". Thanks for pointing it out.

God First, Not Beth

In your copious amounts of posts all over cyberspace, you have admonished us all to not put man above God. You are right, Kyle, and we are all guilty of putting our faith in the wrong places sometimes. Anyone who looks at your responses on Yahoo Answers will see the same post over and over to people who are hurting. Kiari posted that she felt depressed and alone. Among many other things, you said:

"Don't substitute God or his word (the Bible) for a non-living thing, animal, friend, sensual partner, or some activity. Doing such things are against God and he will punish you for it eventually."

Please Kyle, take your own advice. Let Beth go. It's obvious that you're hurting, from the prayer requests on the Christian teen dating site to the new blog you've created - all of these things are evidence of your pain. But you yourself have made the case that as God's children, we hurt because we need a lesson from God. One needs only read your book reviews on to get that message loud and clear. You're hurting for a reason, a reason I hope you start owning as your own and not Beth's fault or God's or anyone else's. I pray you stop looking to Beth as something you need. It's obvious that she wants to be elsewhere, and it's not your job to force her to be yours. Let her go. You will be happier.

Truthfully, as a stranger watching this unfold, I am frightened by your actions. I'm concerned for Beth's safety. I am concerned by the level of maliciousness you've displayed. One moment it seems she is the best thing that ever happened to you, the next moment you seem to hate her and you resort to threats. That kind of black and white behavior is just not healthy. I beg you to find qualified help.

You are in my prayers as always, Kyle. I pray you let God move on your heart to help you to get past this. I pray you start listening and stop talking, just for a little while. I really believe that a little prayerful silence will do your heart some good, and allow you to own up to things that need owning up to.

I say these things not to judge or to hurt. I say these things as a fellow Christian who sees that you have stumbled and are clearly struggling if you are threatening your life. I certainly can't imagine that you'd be so duplicitous as to threaten your own life not because you mean it but so that Beth will be guilted into returning to you. No Christian I know would do such a deceptive thing. So I can only imagine that you are really poised for suicide. To bring it back to the beginning, go to Yahoo Answers and read your own reply to many many suicidal people. Then, take your own advice. You're the one who calls the "hateful hypocrites" out. I know you'd never want to be a hypocrite, yourself.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

... or are we?

Sometimes I have to pause to wonder about some of the things I've read in the blogosphere, and at this very address in particular.

This (at least, where I am) is America, and we enjoy tremendous freedoms. With those freedoms come great social responsibility that we cannot ignore. One of those responsibilities is to one another, to treat one another with respect, and to allow our neighbors to pursue their own brand of happiness. My happiness may very well not be yours. That's all right.

All of us essentially think that our way of doing things, our beliefs, our faiths, our patterns are the right ways. Only God knows the right way, and even then, I say that because I believe in God. You might not. That's your own spiritual business and far be it from me to tell you how your own spiritual journey should go.

This address has been a repository of hatred and intolerance for a long time. I am taking the opportunity of the domain free-up to say that not everyone who believes in salvation is the same. To be a Christian is to be Christlike. It is to be humble and forgiving. It is to hold ourselves to a high standard of morality and ethics. This place is no longer a space filled with intolerance. It is a place of acceptance of all people, and of those people's journeys. This place is a bastion from the cruelty of the world, rather than a place filled with excoriating rants and belittling name calling. Kyle, you are in my prayers, because that's really the best I can do for you. I certainly don't hate you (I don't even know you, except through your footprint in cyberspace), but I do feel sorry for the anger and hatred and vitriol you seem to live with.